Trauma Therapy in California

Feeling out of control, overwhelmed, or constantly on edge?

You’ve come to the right place!

If you are here, there's a good chance that something in your past still feels very present. Maybe certain memories return without warning. Maybe your body feels stuck in a cycle of anxiety or shutdown. Maybe you're exhausted from trying to “move on” when nothing has really resolved.

At Thrive and Feel Psychology, we offer trauma therapy that is collaborative, affirming, and rooted in evidence-based care (including EMDR and drama therapy). We recognize that the source of trauma is rarely one single event, and the path to healing is not always linear. Whether you have experienced complex trauma, a single incident, or a lifetime of invalidation or neglect, you deserve support that honors all of the parts of your story.

What Does Trauma Therapy Involve?

Trauma therapy is a collaborative process. Despite what you may have heard, trauma therapy is not about reliving your worst moments in a therapy office. This therapeutic work is based on finding safety, accessing numerous perspectives around an event, developing skills, and using your strengths to help move toward freedom. 

At Thrive and Feel Psychology, trauma therapy begins with your needs. Your trauma-informed therapist will learn your story, gain an understanding of your nervous system, and work at your pace. Trauma work is not always easy, which is why safety is the priority. When you are doing trauma work with a skilled EMDR therapist, they ensure that you always have at least one foot outside of the memory in the present moment with the therapist (even in moments when you choose to put your other foot inside the memory).

In our experience, clients who decide to embark on trauma healing like to know details about the process. It is important to note that everyone’s therapy process is unique, and the work you do with your trauma therapist may vary based on your specific needs.

That being said, here is a high-level view of the eight steps for trauma-informed care at Thrive and Feel

Step 1: Safety

We begin by building trust. You are never expected to share anything before you feel ready. Our first priority is creating a space that feels safe, validating, and predictable, which is especially important if you live in hypervigilance or have spent years feeling like no one truly “got it.”

In the first stages of trauma therapy, your clinical psychologist will collaborate with you to determine how to create circumstances that put you at ease. 

If you have experienced trauma and have never received treatment, you are likely living with a dysregulated nervous system. From the start of therapy, we will support you in regulating your nervous system. Feeling safe is one sign that your nervous system is regulated. There are other indications that you are regulated, including having the ability to maintain personal boundaries, to react appropriately to stressors because you can integrate information from the past and present, to experience empathy, to laugh, and to access creativity. 

We know that developing safety is difficult when living with unresolved trauma. We believe it is important to remind trauma survivors that we will not even peek at traumatic memories until you have developed the resources you need to regulate your nervous system.

Step 2: Education

At the beginning of trauma treatment, you will likely learn a lot. In fact, parts of those first few sessions may even bring up memories of being in school. There is a clear reason for this: we believe it is critical to educate our clients on important concepts related to trauma therapy. Here are two of the foundational concepts you will learn in trauma treatment at Thrive and Feel.

  • Window of Tolerance: Understanding the framework of the window of tolerance is arguably one of the most powerful tools for trauma recovery because it can help every individual understand why they react the way they do and, more importantly, how to expand their ability to tolerate stress. Psychiatrist Dr. Daniel Siegel, who is known for his contributions to the field of trauma-informed care, introduced the concept of the window of tolerance in the late 90s through his groundbreaking book, The Developing Mind. Siegel (1999) posed that each person has a specific “window” in which different levels of emotional arousal are processed without impairing functioning. The window of tolerance is the "optimal zone of arousal" for an individual to function well.

Simply put, we can cope with stress more effectively when we are in our window. We do not spiral or fall apart when faced with challenges. We can think clearly, make decisions based on our values, and respond effectively to daily ups and downs. And as everyone knows, there are times when we can no longer cope effectively with stress. In these moments, we are not thinking as clearly as usual, and oftentimes, we behave in ways that do not serve us well. Siegel (1999) explained that during times like these, we are pushed outside of our window of tolerance and can no longer function effectively. A critical component of trauma therapy is understanding your nervous system through the lens of the window of tolerance.

For more information on the window of tolerance, check out this video, created by the founder of Thrive and Feel Psychology, Dr. Mary Kate Roohan, PsyD.

  • The “Science” of Trauma: In our experience as EMDR therapists, clients frequently want to understand the “why” behind their trauma response. This is where psychoeducation on the science behind trauma comes into play. While the neurological processes that occur during a trauma response are incredibly complex, we will simplify neuroscience here to illustrate this concept.

When you are emotionally regulated (and within your window of tolerance), your prefrontal cortex—the "thinking" part of your brain—is online and functioning well. However, when you are overwhelmed by stress, your prefrontal cortex essentially goes offline. Your prefrontal cortex is essentially the control center of your executive functioning. Executive functioning plays a role in decision-making, problem-solving, impulse control, and emotion regulation - it is quite an important part of human behavior! More specifically, the prefrontal cortex (the boss of all executive functioning) reminds us to pause and consider the best course of action, rather than reacting to immediate emotional impulses. Research shows that the prefrontal cortex connects the brain’s most developed region, responsible for thinking and reasoning, with the limbic system and brainstem, which control our emotional and instinctive responses. In essence, it connects our human-developed brain to our animal brain.

When we are experiencing a trauma response, the prefrontal cortex is essentially blocked. The human parts of our brain stop communicating effectively with the more primal parts, and we cannot see the whole picture. We are no longer “integrated,” which causes us to respond to the world in a state of fight, flight, freeze, or fawn.

Step 3: Identifying Your Trauma Response 

As trauma therapists, we know that trauma can manifest in a multitude of ways. Similarly, there are numerous ways to discuss what a trauma response can look like.

In your work with a trauma-informed clinical psychologist, you will find language that feels most reflective of your experience with trauma. We believe the primary function of “trauma terminology” is to help you better understand yourself. We can use words to support you in developing insight around the difference between when your nervous system is balanced in comparison to when it is overwhelmed. 

The following section includes examples of five different terms you may use to describe your trauma response

  • Hyperarousal

When a stressful event leads to a significant increase in energy-consuming processes in your body, you may end up in a state of hyperarousal. If you experience an increase in heart rate or a pounding sensation in your head, you may be experiencing the "trauma response" of fight or flight. Folks in a state of hyperarousal frequently feel overwhelmed, anxious, or agitated. Additionally, in this state of too much arousal, you may find yourself acting impulsively or defensively.

As EMDR therapists, we often see clients in hyperarousal when they first arrive at therapy. They describe feeling "on alert" all the time, unable to relax, and constantly scanning for danger. 

Before we even discuss the memories that the client wants to work on in EMDR therapy, we help the client understand how they may be experiencing a trauma response. In the early stages of the therapeutic work, we get very specific about what hyperarousal looks like for them. Psychoeducation on trauma and the window of tolerance is important because the client must be able to identify this state when they are outside of the therapy room.

  • Hypoarousal 

On the other end of the spectrum, hypoarousal occurs when your body experiences a significant increase in energy-conserving processes. When in a state of hypoarousal, you may experience decreased heart or respiratory rate. You may be in a state of "shut down," characterized by feeling numb and disconnected, or experience lethargy. When in hypoarousal, it can also be difficult to think clearly.

Some individuals who have experienced trauma find themselves in a chronic state of hypoarousal. Individuals who experience nervous system dysregulation as a result of complex trauma may present with symptoms that can be mistaken for another disorder. For example, many traumatized individuals who are in a chronic state of hypoarousal as a result of trauma meet the criteria for Major Depressive Disorder (MDD). 

Oftentimes, clients will come to therapy because they are “depressed.” When we begin the trauma therapy process, however, these clients frequently realize that a history of complex trauma has led them to a chronic state of hypoarousal. The “depression” clears when the memories are reprocessed.

  • Mixed State

Emerging research indicates that trauma can also manifest as a "mixed state." If you resonate with this description, you may find that you experience hyperarousal and hypoarousal simultaneously, or that you find yourself rapidly alternating between states. For example, you might feel agitated and anxious (hyperarousal/chaos) while also experiencing emotional numbness or detachment (hypoarousal/rigidity).

  • Chaos

Some clients conceptualize the space of nervous system dysregulation (when they are outside of their window of tolerance) as either “chaos” or “rigidity.” In a state of chaos (often equated to hyperarousal), your emotions are in charge. You have less access to thinking and logic, and may feel more "chaotic," which can manifest as reactivity, anxiety, inattention, or emotional outbursts. 

  • Rigidity

On the other hand, in a state of rigidity (often equated to hypoarousal), you do not have access to your emotions. You may find that you “feel like a robot” or that you are “just going through the motions.” In a state of rigidity, you may also have a sense that you are observing your experience, rather than participating in it. This state is also characterized by emotional detachment, fatigue, and brain fog.

Step 4: Understanding Your Capacity for Stress

Some people seem to be able to handle enormous amounts of stress before "breaking down," while others seem to become dysregulated after what seems like a very small stressor. We cannot know exactly what is going on with another person's nervous system by observing them; however, we do know that how much stress an individual can tolerate (aka their window width) varies from person to person. Research indicates that the following three factors can lead to lower stress tolerance. 

  • Biological Factors

Your disposition, temperament, and brain chemistry all matter. Some of us come into the world with certain biological factors, like a more sensitive nervous system, that make it harder to cope with overwhelming experiences. Possessing these biological traits does not indicate that there is something “wrong” with you - everyone is born with a different genetic makeup.

Some people have genetic markers that result in a system that may be more easily activated, more reactive, or slower to recover from stress. It is important to understand that your genetics set the "baseline" of your capacity to tolerate stress. 

  • Experiences in Childhood

Your history has a significant impact on your ability to tolerate stress. In attachment-based therapy, we discuss how the relationship that you had with your primary caregiver in childhood impacts you throughout your life. 

Attachment theory, which is utilized in trauma therapy at Thrive and Feel, teaches us that if you had caregivers who were unable to teach you how to regulate your nervous system, you may not have learned this skill on your own. When we are young, we do not have the capacity to regulate our nervous systems. For example, when an infant cries, they are expressing distress and need help to feel better because they are unable to meet their own needs. The act of supporting someone else in regulating, a process called co-regulation, is critical to developing healthy regulation skills later in life. The reality is, however, that many of us did not experience consistent co-regulation with an attachment figure; as a result, we may have developed a lower capacity to tolerate stress. 

Research also indicates that if you experience adverse childhood experiences, you are more likely to have a smaller capacity for tolerating stress. Chronic exposure to stress in early life—such as neglect, abuse, or witnessing violence—can shape how your brain and body respond to threat, making you more reactive to everyday stressors and less able to return to a calm baseline (Felitti et al., 1998; Teicher & Samson, 2016). This does not mean you are broken—it means your nervous system adapted in the best way it could. 

Thankfully, there is a way to counteract the impact of adverse childhood experiences. Trauma therapy can help you increase your capacity to tolerate stress by building safety, regulation skills, and new patterns of connection.

  • Present Moment Factors

Your ability to tolerate stress is impacted by what is occurring right this second. Are you hungry? Tired? Do you have a cold? Are you sore from a workout? Do you have a significant life stressor on your mind? The experiences you are having in the present moment - however small or insignificant they may seem - can impact your capacity to tolerate stress.

Step 5: Increase Stress Tolerance

It can be disheartening to recognize the ways stress impacts us more than we expected. The good news is that research indicates that even if you developed a narrow window during childhood that resulted in a lower capacity to tolerate stress, you have the ability to expand your window width and increase your stress tolerance.

A foundational component of trauma therapy is to increase your capacity to tolerate stress. The ability to tolerate discomfort is critical in trauma work, and you will benefit from a wide window of tolerance during therapy and in your daily life.

We will discuss dozens of ways to increase stress tolerance during your therapeutic journey, and you will be practicing these strategies inside and outside of sessions. That being said, all trauma survivors would benefit from learning these skills, so here are three strategies to think about before undergoing your trauma treatment. 

  1. Know Yourself

Awareness is everything. A critical component of trauma treatment is developing an understanding of what to looks and feels like for you when you are overwhelmed by stress. If you are unable to tell when you are outside of our window, it is very difficult to get back in. 

As you prepare to enter trauma treatment, we encourage you to think about your answers to the following questions:

  • What typically pushes you outside your window?

  • What does it feel like when you're outside your window/overwhelmed by stress?

  • In the past, what has helped you regulate when you are having a trauma response?

When you know yourself, you are better able to navigate stress effectively.

2. Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness is quite a buzzword these days. If you Google this term, you will find a wide range of definitions. At Thrive and Feel Psychology, we conceptualize mindfulness as "intentional awareness of the present moment." 

We can be mindful of both external experiences (what is happening outside our bodies) and internal experiences (our thoughts, feelings, and sensations).

Developing mindfulness skills does not equate to adhering to a strict schedule where you meditate for an hour every day. In fact, you can practice mindfulness at any moment, even for just a minute. 

3. EMDR Therapy

EMDR is one of the many therapy modalities you can participate in that will help you widen your window of tolerance. In EMDR, you learn resourcing skills and practice them with your therapist. 

As you participate in EMDR resourcing, you will notice how you are slowly able to tolerate more emotional stress without becoming overwhelmed. You will notice that increasing your ability to stay grounded and regulate your emotions will benefit you not only inside the therapy room but also in your day-to-day life. We also created this video, which will provide you with five strategies to help you increase your capacity to tolerance stress.

Step 6: Developing Strategies to Cope with Trauma 

If you participate in trauma therapy at Thrive and Feel, you will learn a wide range of strategies to help you cope. Here are three of the strategies you will learn, practice, and integrate through your trauma work.

  • TIPP Skill

TIPP is a distress tolerance skill taught in the evidence-based practice of Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) and can be quite helpful if you find yourself overwhelmed by stress. The goal of TIPP is to balance our nervous system by activating the parasympathetic nervous system. The skill includes:

  • T - Temperature - Change the temperature of your body by using cold water (such as taking a shower, swimming in a pool, or splashing your face). You may also grab something cold and put it against your body (i.e, taking some frozen berries from the freezer).

  • I - Intense Exercise (raising the heart rate quickly)

  • P - Paced Breathing

  • P - Paired Muscle Relaxation/Progressive Muscle Relaxation

For more details on the TIPP skill, check out this video.

  • The 5-4-3-2-1 Method

The goal of this "5-4-3-2-1 Method" is to engage your five senses, which can help bring you into the present moment. To use this strategy, state (out loud if possible):

  • 5 things you can see

  • 4 things you can touch

  • 3 things you can hear

  • 2 things you can smell

  • 1 thing you can taste

  • Butterfly Hug

This strategy, which is used frequently in trauma therapy, helps regulate the nervous system through bilateral stimulation (BLS). The Butterfly Hug is based on the idea that BLS activates the entire brain, which can help file memories in a more helpful way. It can be used by anyone, but is often used by EMDR therapists to help trauma survivors reprocess painful memories.

Here are the steps for the butterfly hug:

  • Sit or stand comfortably & relax your body

  • Cross your arms in front of your chest, placing your fingertips on your collarbones or your hands on your opposite shoulders

  • Gently tap your shoulders in an alternating rhythm, as if your hands are butterfly wings

  • Breathe slowly and deeply

  • Focus on your breathing and the movement of your hands

  • Continue for a few minutes until you feel calmer

This therapeutic technique, also known as the "Hug of Self Love," can help with stress, anxiety, and overwhelm.

Step 7: Reprocessing

The previous steps lay the foundation for the reprocessing stages of EMDR. Most clients elect to participate in reprocessing as part of their treatment, and by this stage of trauma treatment, they are ready. In fact, they have already done significant resourcing (the early stages of EMDR treatment).

To learn more about the specifics of EMDR, check out this page. In the meantime, here is a quick summary: EMDR can help you recover from trauma by processing past traumatic experiences in a way that reduces their emotional intensity. The use of bilateral stimulation (BLS) helps your brain reprocess distressing memories so that they are re-integrated adaptively.

Step 8: Freedom

As we do the trauma work, you will likely notice a shift: more clarity, less reactivity, a stronger sense of self. Throughout treatment, we will integrate these shifts into your daily life—building relationships, self-trust, and a sense of possibility.

We call the final stage of treatment “freedom” because that is how it is experienced by many: freedom from the past. As you begin to feel this sense of freedom, you will likely be ready to “free” yourself from therapy.

 Frequently Asked Questions

  • Trauma is heavy. It takes great courage and vulnerability to engage in trauma therapy. It is completely natural to feel nervous about starting the process! 

    The good news is that your trauma-informed therapists are here to guide you. After your therapist walks you through the steps of treatment, you will likely feel less overwhelmed. Your psychologist will explain that our bodies can become stressed when revisiting memories; however, you will develop strategies that can be used to manage that stress. In other words, before you even touch a painful memory, you will have a list of things that you can do to help you regulate your nervous system.

    As trauma therapists, we are trained to be mindful of whether our clients are experiencing an adverse response, such as dissociation or flashbacks. If we see the client becoming dysregulated to an extent where their body is under more stress than they can manage, we find ways to ground them immediately. When we get to a place in the EMDR treatment process where we are going into the past, we are working so that by the end of the session, the client is back in the window.

  • Emotional dysregulation can sometimes be an indication of a trauma response; however, it could also be an appropriate response to life stressors.

    If you are becoming dysregulated in a way that leads to other problems, then you may find that you would benefit from trauma therapy. The skills that you will learn in EMDR will help decrease the chance of becoming dysregulated in the future. 

  • The cost of a 50-minute EMDR therapy session with a Thrive and Feel therapist is $200. We do offer sliding scale services. Schedule a consult to learn more. 

  • There’s no one-size-fits-all answer when it comes to healing from trauma, because trauma impacts everyone differently. At Thrive and Feel Psychology, we believe the best therapy for trauma is the one that meets you where you are: your story, your nervous system, your strengths, and your needs.

    That said, there are a few evidence-based approaches we often use in our trauma work:

    EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) helps the brain reprocess painful memories so they no longer feel so raw or overwhelming. It’s especially effective for clients who feel “stuck” in past experiences, even when they logically know the danger has passed. Many clients appreciate that EMDR is structured and doesn’t require talking through every detail—your brain does the work, and we guide you through it gently.

    Drama Therapy offers a creative and embodied way to process trauma, particularly helpful for clients who may struggle to find words for what they’ve been through. Through role play, storytelling, movement, and metaphor, we create space to express, reframe, and reclaim your narrative. This work can be powerful, especially if you’re someone who has learned to shut down or disconnect from emotional experiences.

    Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) supports clients in developing skills to regulate their emotions. Trauma can leave people feeling emotionally out of control, disconnected, or chronically overwhelmed. DBT provides concrete, actionable tools to regulate emotions, manage triggers, and build safe, meaningful relationships. It’s a foundational part of our work for clients who want both healing and skills to navigate everyday life.

    In reality, the most effective trauma therapy often blends multiple approaches. We work collaboratively to figure out what resonates with you and adjust as your needs evolve. Whether your trauma is rooted in a single event or years of complex, relational pain, there is a path forward.

    You don’t have to do it alone. We’re here to walk alongside you.

  • Releasing trauma from the body can be achieved through methods like grounding techniques and bilateral stimulation. Grounding helps you reconnect with the present moment, while bilateral stimulation (which is used in EMDR therapy) can help process and release stored trauma. These practices work to regulate the nervous system, allowing the body to heal. It is essential to work with a trained trauma therapist who can guide you through these techniques at your own pace, ensuring a safe and empowering experience.

  • Some clients come to trauma therapy after reading about the 5 R’s on social media. The “5 R’s” is a concept used to help simplify the ways to address trauma. 

    The 5 R’s include:

    Realize: Understand how trauma affects individuals, families, and communities.

    Recognize: Identify the signs and symptoms of trauma in clients.

    Respond: Integrate knowledge about trauma into practice.

    Resist Re-traumatization: Actively work to avoid reactivating traumatic experiences.

    Relationships/Recovery: Emphasize the healing power of safe, supportive, and empowering relationships.

    Similar to the concept of the window of tolerance, the 5 R’s help folks better understand the process of trauma recovery.